Alive and sort of well.

Artsy “I am ~le tired~” post bike ride photo

It’s been literally ages since I last wrote anything meaningful here (wait did I ever write anything meaningful here…?). That is not to say that nothing has been going on, more that way too much has been going on and I haven’t felt much like writing nor had time too.

I am the kind of person that I never make small changes over time. Instead I make one massive change at all once and then force myself to adapt to it. I did this in a big way recently when I moved out, changed jobs, transferred schools, joined the injury list, and started another sport. It took me a few weeks to adjust and it definitely wasn’t easy. There may have been a couple breakdowns where I thought I was putting too much on my plate, but I have come out on the other side a stronger and happier person. I really feel like in the last three months I am really started to grow into who I really am as lame and corny as that sounds.

Part of this coincided with my birthday in which I joined a new decade and a new age bracket (I am saddest about the age bracket). It was a little bittersweet since I was planning on a big race for my birthday to celebrate, but after being injured and only just hitting 20 mile weeks of running, that was not a possibility anymore. In fact I ended up working all day on my birthday but I made up for the crummy day by sandwiching it between two days of fun bike riding. So although I still wince a little when people ask for my age, there was no catastrophe and I can still lie and tell people I am only 24.

Since this is mainly to record my running adventures I guess I can update on that as well. Being injured sucks. Being injured for months really sucks. The amount of time that I missed out on can never be recouped, and neither can all the money I spent on race entries I didn’t get to use. What I did do, was to put all that anger and frustration and channel it into getting better. It is no lie that I have been covering up and getting by with lingering issues for awhile. This injury is almost certain to have been cause by overcompensation of major weaknesses in my entire right side. After doing some strength testing and power ratings, this was confirmed and I was completely sobered up to just how much work it was going to take to come back. This meant a lot of careful, easy running and work outs, and some physical therapy and strength work to even myself out. It has felt like a long and lonesome road, but if my last couple of work outs are anything to go by, the hard work is paying off.

Now you would think with my fitness returning I would be chomping at the bit to start racing again and I am, but I also want to be patient and come back as strong as possible. Short distance is in the cards for awhile and I am enjoying challenging myself in a completely new way. Also besides running, my biking skills are improving and every time I did I want to ride more and more. I am balancing both and I feel like so far they are complimenting each other well. It is strange to go for a 2+ hour ride instead of a 13+ mile run, but it is also much more enjoyable to be cycling in a group having a laugh than freezing on a long run in February. I never thought I would choose a bike ride over running, but it has happened several times.

So I really find myself at an odds with what to do with this blog. I used it to track my Chicago progress, and then was planning on using it for tracking my first ultra distance. I now find myself with a schedule of track meets and bike rides and I don’t know if that is interesting enough to even bother writing about. Track meets will be starting soon but my fitness will not peak until the season is almost over. Do I just keep a running training log with my usual bitching and complaining? My not-funny quips on my running life? Does anyone really care? I don’t know but for now I will think of updating it every once in a while as I get stronger running, and continue to be an idiot biking.

2015: Peaks and Valleys

2015 is coming to a close and I guess I am obligated excited to review what my year has looked like as far as running is concerned. This past year went completely opposite to how I thought it was going to go, and ended up with some big goals accomplished just at a time when I wasn’t expecting it.

So when the year opened I was focused on having a strong spring season, since I had missed the fall due to my stress fracture suffered in Chicago ’14 training. Of course, since I am a human disaster, I ended up pushing too far waaaay too fast and once again was out of commission thanks to anemia and exhaustion.

After focusing on my nutrition and a proper training program with hard/easy days built in, I was able to bounce back in the last summer with a winning race and discover that trail running is the shit and I love it.

Sadly, once again I suffered a minor set-back, and had to rush through my Chicago training in order to get fit for the big race. This meant I had absolutely zero expectations and was able to enjoy the race and experience for what it is… which resulted in a new and unexpected PR and Boston 2017 qualification. Favorite race ever? You better fucking believe it.

2015 ended the same way it began, with pain and injury. Being forced to take some time off from running has been hard (you think I would be used to it by now), but I have learned that I have other athletic pursuits that I really enjoy. My love of cycling is only just starting to sprout, and I am devouring any and all knowledge I can get my hands on.

If I can say anything, it’s that this year I learned some big lessons on patience and to trust the training process. I learned that I really enjoy hard workouts, and need to learn to enjoy the easy runs as well. I learned that I can live without running (but who wants too?) but that I am not the happiest person when I am not running. I also have to say that looking back I have a lot more hard times than good ones, but it was all worth it to get that solid BQ.  I would say over all my running has improved, my paces are faster, the races that I did run I placed extremely well, but I tried to do too much and missed out on a lot due to lack of proper recovery and focus. Hopefully with 2016 I will use this experience to avoid so many problems and setbacks, but knowing myself I won’t. 😉

To anyone who has bothered to read this blog for this year – thanks for your support and I hope you were at least entertained by my journey this year. Here’s to a better 2016!

 

The Girl Who Was a Runner

I have to admit that I have purposely neglected this thing. I think in part I was trying to avoid facing my thoughts and trying to make sense of where I am at right now. How about I do this in bullet point style to try and have some sort of organization..

• I made it successfully through Finals week and graduated with my Associates in Arts. A huge portion of my stress was coming not only from this but also getting my transfer finalized to start at my new University in the spring. I managed to survive with my sanity mostly in tact.
• Thanksgiving flew by and Christmas is right around the corner. I’ve been a bit of a scrooge because of the stress of school and personal stuff, but I have finally started to come around to enjoying more of a break than the holiday itself. This is my first holiday season living completely on my own and it is a little strange and lonely.
• I am enjoying using my free time to explore other avenues to relieve stress and enjoy myself. My bike is getting quite the workout lately and I am enjoying taking it on long group rides on the greenways every weekend. I went from having never ridden with a group, or on the roads, to having done both in the space of a week. My ability to clip in and out is improving as well as my shifting and handling abilities. I wont say the same for my balance and turning… I will openly admit that I ride fast but like an idiot.

Photographic evidence of idiot on bicycle shenanigans…

• But wait! Where is all the running?? How many miles am I doing?? What about the races I am running?? Well I haven’t been doing a lot of it. My hamstring and I decided that we would be better off going separate ways and taking a break for a while. I knew something was off after the trail race I DQ’d back in November and my hammie got more and more angry. What started as an annoying knot, grew into a massive spasm, grew into a severe strain. It has taken weeks and weeks of zero running to be able to walk around comfortably and I am in no rush to run with pain any longer. I miss running and it is a huge part of my identity and so not having it for the past month has been a little traumatizing. With all the other stress in my life the past month, and then an injury on top of that, it has been a challenging time emotionally. I really don’t know how I have any friends willing to put up with my cranky ass anymore, but somehow I do. Thanks guys! I really don’t hate you!

So moving forward into the New Year I will once again be starting from scratch and looking for new goals to accomplish. My skills on the bike are improving and I have been toying with the idea of something in that area. I have also been playing with the idea of slowly coming back to some shorter distance running for a bit. At this point everything is up in the air and I plan to keep it that way.

Downtime Adventures

So late as usual but here is a quick recap of some of the adventures I have been having as I close out the fall racing season.

With my big race out of the way and slowing down the training for a bit, I have been focused on taking it easy and having as much fun as possible. I haven’t done any speed work (which is nice because I am at the stage where I am starting to miss it) and it is nice to see that the accumulative fatigue hasn’t hurt my paces at all. Without speed work and long runs by easy paces have fallen back to the 7:30 range which is pleasant especially with the fall weather.

I also have had the opportunity to do more fun running related things like actually getting my ass to run club, and pacing my friend for the City of Oaks Half Marathon last weekend. I love the City of Oaks course since it is basically a mash up of my favorite running routes downtown. Yes, the course is hilly, but Raleigh is hilly. The running theme of my training is “The More Hills The Better” and I love love love running hilly races (and crushing people’s spirits as I pass them on them). So when my friend mentioned he wanted to go for a PR of 1:50 I of course jumped at the chance to help him to this goal (and get a quality long run in with support haha). Also the start finish is only about 10 minutes from my house so #winning. The race day weather was brilliant (started in the upper 40’s-50’s, overcast, spotty light rain) and I enjoyed settling in and providing support. I focused on making sure we were running his race pace, while also preparing for the tougher portions of the race to come. My friend absolutely #crushedit and went all the way to a 1:44 PR which was 25 minutes better than his last effort. I was more than proud and happy to have been of help.

So I only have a couple small races to wrap up the rest of the year. I am looking at a 10 Miler and possibly a 12k with some sort of Thanksgiving race (or it would be fun to just do a nice long trail run with friends). After that it is time to look to keeping myself keen over the winter and deciding on a goal for the spring.

Downtime…

So it has been almost three weeks since the Chicago Marathon has passed. I know that I meant to recap the entire weekend (and I promise to try and revisit it later), but if I don’t get back to current events I know that I will slack off and forget to post at all.

So what have I been up to since exceeding my expectations back in the Windy City? A lot of relaxing, a lot of school work, and a little bit of running. I have been guilty in the past of jumping from one training cycle to the next, without ever taking enough of a break in between. My usual recovery from a marathon was two days off and then right back at it. This is of course the dumbest plan ever and I believe is what led to me having a lot of stupid injury issues that either took forever to heal up, or become major issues that led to a lot of time off. After Chicago I had already decided that after such an intense short training cycle I was going to take a complete week of absolutely zero running before trying to come back. Now, after Chicago although I felt amazing with no aches or pains (I have never finished a marathon feeling so good before), I decided that a week of complete rest was even more deserved to reward my body for out preforming what I think I was even in shape for. It is really hard to go from 50+ miles a week to zero but I knew that I would be better for it in the long run and so I sucked it up and enjoyed being a normal person for a week.

So what did I do with my free time? Mostly slept. It took me a few days of some solid 9+ hour nights to feel like my body was recovered. Although I didn’t have any injury issues my body was Le Tired and wanted to nap allll the times. Besides sleeping I was also focused on eating what ever I wanted and what my body was craving. For whatever reason, all I wanted was healthy veggies and fruit but I made sure to continue to get some solid protein and carbs to restore what was lost. Then I focused on the things that I was missing up on while running so fucking much. I went out with friends, I did a lot of school work to get ahead, I read, I actually watched some tv, I even finally finished moving and unpacking my stuff. When I felt like my legs needed a little motion to get the blood flowing, I got back on my lonely bike for some nice rides. I did yoga to help stretch out an knots and bring some calm back after such a hectic but fun trip. Basically I just enjoyed life and took a lot of “me time”.

The one thing I made sure not to focus on was any sort of returning to run schedule or the thought of any goal races to come. It is always a little depressing once a big race is over and I can sort of rush to work towards something else to relive the excitement. This time I knew that I needed to give it time and really decide what I want to do. The thought of jumping back into marathon training was pretty unappealing and I didn’t need to. I don’t have any desire to try and beat my time and go for a faster spring marathon (I am quite content to sit on a 3:26) and so I am not planing on going for that any time soon. When I returned to any mileage (and I kept it super low the first few days) it was all easy miles without looking at the watch and just going my feel. Luckily the weather as been AH-MAZ-ING so running again instead of being a chore has been a blast. This is a feeling that you tend to lose after weeks and weeks of miles that have to get done.

So what now? Well now that I am back to a sort-of-running schedule I have a couple ideas on the horizon. I didn’t know if I would continue the blog now that Chicago is over, but I have found it fun and helpful to keeping track of just how my training is going. So I think I will continue to recap my weekly training as well as just spewing my random thoughts. Because lets face it: people get really sick of hearing me talk about running. For now I will enjoy my easy runs and in a couple days really decide where I am going from here!

Training log: Week 9

I know its been a good week when my shoes look like this..

Is this what it feels like? When everything starts falling into place? I don’t want to jinx anything.. but this is the week I needed. After the first 7 weeks of weird pains and issues, forced rest, frustrations, and not being able to see any light at the end of the tunnel, this week was exactly what I needed. I can finally see the possibility of actually making it to my goal race and being able to enjoy myself. Thank every deity known to man.

I decided last week, to focus on slowly building my mileage safely and enjoy running. Throw all paces and just focus on what my body was telling me that day. I am glad to see that I did this wisely (for once) and was able to not only hit the mileage I wanted but actually went over a little bit extra. I did this all by being careful and I never felt like I was asking too much of myself and I ended the week feeling great and not exhausted and spent.

This week included:

1. One day of two-a-days
2. One speed workout of 12×400’s
3. One long run (only 8 miles)
4. 3 days of easy trail running.

Even with hitting about 42 miles my body feels great for that big of a jump from the last week. In part thanks to making sure that I was running super easy and not taxing myself. I was shocked to see my 400’s were actually faster than what I thought I could manage, and my long run was at a faster average than I was running on my easy runs. Basically, I am doing exactly what I should be doing. Yes I am still not anywhere around what my original goal was, but you know what? Fuck that goal. My goal is to have fun. Even with a decent week there is zero pain or discomfort in any of the places I was having issues before and that to me means more than anything.

For the next week my plan is to stay on track with both my runs and my supplimental training. I also will be focusing on keeping my easy runs easy and not push the pace even though I am feeling more capable. Let’s keep the speed to the speed days and enjoy my fabulous easy trail runs where I can just let go and enjoy making the outdoors my bitch. 😉

Training log: Week 8

I am so proud of myself. Here I am writing a recap on a sort-of-normal time frame! It is the little things in life, people.

This past week is going to reflect some low mileage, but it is a huge giant leap forwards in regards to my training for Chicago. This was the first week that I have run 100% pain free, zero limpy-gimpy gait, enjoyable, happy, fun running. Although my paces were not as fast as I would like (damn my competitive nature that will never die), I am content with the fact that they were easy, relaxed, and about 30-45 seconds faster than what I was doing the weeks leading up to my rest week. I focused on starting back very slowly and keeping the runs short, only adding distance after 2-3 days if things were feeling fine. So far this has worked and I am going to continue to build my mileage in this same way for the next week or so.

I am also making sure to upkeep my strength training 2-3x a week, plus my daily conditioning exercises for my hips, core, and calves. Starting back healthy I can really notice a lot more strength and stability from spending so much extra time strength training (hills that I would hate are now a joke). Strength training is one of those things that people always would tell me to try more of but I hate weights with a passion and never followed through on the advice. Such a fool I am!

There has also been an increase in yoga, to help with my flexibility and stretching. I have it set for 2-3 days a week, one of them being my rest day from running so I have no excuse to skip it. I woke up super early on Friday and hit up a free sunrise yoga class and it was sooooo worth the 5am wake up call to get there on time. It took place at a rose garden/outdoor theater and it was basically a magical experience.

All in all I am feeling so much better about things this week. Having my body feel healed and knowing that I am getting stronger is such a positive motivator and I am looking forward to my training now when before I was dreading every run and stuck in a rut. I can’t wait to see what October brings my way.

The Comeback Kid Returns

I have found that with I guess you could consider my “running career”, I have had to let go of always having a concrete plan of training. Yet again, I was deep in training for my goal race, my BQ qualifying goal race, only to have my training get derailed right when it seemed to be going perfectly. It wasn’t a stress fracture this time, and the time I had to take off was only about a month, but it through my training off so much that I wouldn’t have been able to get any 20+ mile runs before my marathon/ So I did the only logical thing. I gave up and accepted it. I think that missing my goal race last fall sort of helped me handle this a little better, because although it was a bitter pill to swallow I knew that it was the correct decision and life would go on.

In the time since, I decided to focus on reworking my training plans and the whole idea I have had this far of what goes into distance running. I know that I have been extremely lucky because I am mostly going by trial and lots and lots of errors. In a perfect world I would hire a coach and be told exactly what to do x,y, and z ways so that I could improve and remain healthy. The world is faaar from fucking perfect and so I have myself and whatever information I glean from the internets, friends, an various eves-dropping opportunities I find.

So where am I now? I am returning back to form slowly but surely. I am trying to focus on speed work while taking proper easy days and keeping my paces safe. Running slow and easy is something I never bothered with before and the opportunity to slow the pace and recover while getting back to just enjoying running is a very healing thing for me. I am also making sure to do those things that one should always be doing but I didn’t bother because I am too lazy stupid busy tired OKAY THE WORST.

I don’t know where this has me at now training wise. I feel strong in my speed work and strong on my long runs. I don’t know what my race pace will be like but I have a half that I am aiming a PR at in the beginning of June. If things seem promising after that, I plan to continue to use this new training strategy into my fall marathon training. I don’t know what is going to happen but I am finally starting to feel like maybe I am figuring out how to finally unlock my actual potential and learn how to really become a proper runner.

Holidays for days

Since we last left our sarcastic hero, I had just run my mental road block of fourteen miles and killed it, finished out my fall semester and was looking forward to break and holidays with many plans of which I was going to accomplish! In reality, I have accomplished zero of those things, crammed finishing my holiday shopping in the middle of the worst days of work I’ve ever experienced, and somehow Christmas came in went in a delightful blaze of glory that was definitely not long enough.

Holidays with my family are always super low-key and easy. It’s basically an excuse for us all to get together, eat, and then nap. I had to cram my run in Christmas morning before opening of presents (I’m the only runner in the family and I know my place as the black sheep), and then it was eat, drink, and be merry for the rest of the day.

One of my running related presents is registration for an upcoming trail race, something that I have never taken part in but I like to challenge and attempt to destroy myself in many ways. It will be interesting to see how this ends up with my trail experience being quite limited but the course description did say that it was “open for all levels of experience”.. right up my alley.

Now it is almost the New Year and I feel like I need to do a dramatic year end reflection blog but I will spare everyone that drama for another day. Right now, I’m in a happy place where I’m at and I am trying to focus on living through the terrible winter weather we are experiencing. I know that I can be a super wussy southerner, but running in 30 degrees and drizzle is not on my list of things I enjoy.

I hope that anyone reading this has had a lovely holiday season and a  Happy New Year ahead of them!

Fourteen.

I have finally reached the 5th week in my training cycle for the Wrightsville Beach Marathon. Now, I realize that “finally” seems  little dramatic since it doesn’t take hardly any time at all to reach this point, but this week was looming like a giant monster to me. The 5th week of training was the point where I had to abandon my plans of running Chicago. I had pushed myself all week through pain, and I finished the 14 mile long run broken, defeated, and in pain. So I have been dreading getting to this point in my training again. 14 miles would be the longest run that I have had since that same point back in July. I know that I am healed, and although I am not 100% I am coming back stronger. Still I was a little intimidated to be back at this point.

So for this last big test, I decided to just face the boogeyman and get it over with. I was running solo since my running partner is resting from the Kiawah Marathon, but I was a little happy to be running this on my own. I felt a little silly being so freaked out over just a 14 mile long run, but I knew the best way for me to face my fears and get over this was on my own (such a lone wolf). I picked my usual long run route on a crushed surface, and also decided to start first thing in the morning. It ended up being really freaking dark!!! but there were plenty of other runners out on the trails so at least it wasn’t creepy. I actually even decided to wear my ipod (even though I hate running with music) in an effort to drown out my dramatic inner monologue about the whole thing. I have to thank mother nature for providing the best distraction for the fact it started SNOWING and SLEETING at about 4 miles into my run (this isn’t supposed to happen in North Carolina!!!). I was optimistically thinking (Me? Optimistic?) that it would only last a short while and remain pretty like but bitch be crazy because it only got worse. Oh well, I should have known that running a mental struggle of 14 miles wasn’t tough enough, it needed to be snowing, sleeting, and 30 degrees as well. Luckily I don’t back down from a challenge, and I was able to power through (on legs still tired from racing last weekend! UGH!) and kick that 14 miles ass.

So 14 miles are now done and dusted. I can now feel like I have moved beyond the past, and can finally focus completely on the future.